Prague is hands down the coolest city that I have been to so far. The city is amazing and I will have photos up when I figure out how. Now on To the good stuff.
1: For $25 American, in a Thai Message Parlor, you can...stick your feet it an aquarium full of fish and let them eat all the dead skin. It was the strangest feeling in the world, not to mention you have to do it in the window display of the busiest street in Prague. Needless to say, I made a lot of new friends.
2: Never go on a pub crawl in Prague. It is bad when the chaperone of a trip for 18 year olds is the 2nd youngest man in the bar. Also, 18 year old women do not like 45 year old Indian dudes. Whodda thunk it?
3: For every icing, there is an equal and opposite re-icing. The kids thought it was cute to Ice me in Amsterdam, but they are being picked off one by one by a very spiteful chaperone.
4: Casinos in the Czek Republic are pretty sketchy. Just to prove a point to my kids that they were getting ripped off I bet about $20 in black Jack and got waxed. Now anyone who has seen me play blackjack before knows I'm worthless at it, but this was a whole new level of awful. Damn thiefs.
5: Europe has a funny way of balancing itself out. I saw hands down the most attractive women in Prague, but at the same time I saw the ugliest human beings in the world. They made the women of state fairs look like Playboy bunnies. I'm surprised that their government let's them go outside during the day time without wearing a bee keeper suit. If you want to make millions of dollars, go to Prague and make Halloween masks out of these women's faces. Kids would have nightmares for years.
6: Skinny jeans are sadly still popular here, but at the same time so are jorts. Again Europe has balanced itself out. As lame and emberrasing as skinny jeans are, an old man wearing extremely inappropriate jorts is badass enough that I can forgive the jeans.
7: What is the deal with pizza places and argentine steak houses? Everywhere you go, this is all you can see. Now I love pizza and steak, but come on! How do these places stay in business when 90% of the resturaunts in your county sell the exact same thing? Luckily Germany is different.
8: going to the bathroom costs a lot of money. Why in the hell are they allowed to charge you .50 Euros to use the toilet? I have spent more money on expelling the food I ate, than the food itself. It's cool though, I got my revenge of the bathroom in Prague's Royal Palace.
9: Hotdogs are now ruined for me. I had a late night hot dog and it was hands down one of the best things I have ever eaten. I can never go back to Oscar Meyer now. Damn you Prague.
10: Trying to get 10 girls back from a bar is harder than herding cats on catnip and cocaine. They wonder, yell, talk yo every guy they pass, and are HUNGRY! Not to say that they aren't a ton of fun, but getting them home explains why I am getting paid so much to do this.
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